Thursday, April 28, 2011

On His Knees, Eager To Please

There are those who question the President's motivation in releasing his archived long-form Hawaii birth certificate, who cannot take him at face value. I'm not one of them. I think it's good that he did it, because anyone who continues to focus on the birth certificate as an issue crawls further out the Limb of Discernable Looniness. This includes those who ask why he didn't do it sooner; the answer to that is simply that he already released his fucking birth certificate, under the law of the state of his birth. No further answer to that fucktarded question is necessary.

It's unfortunate that The Trump has chosen to pursue that line of inquiry, because it just exposes him as dumber and dumber, and I really want that Trump/Palin (or Palin/Trump) ticket for 2012. Yes, I maintain that Obama is better than any (labelled) Republican, and better than anarchy or revolution or civil war or whatever the fuck it is that sophists want, if they even know or can agree. But que sera squared, and all that.

So why is it so easy for me to take Obama at face value on this, to believe that he really thinks he was going to put the issue to rest (or, to indulge WaPo gossips, that he got so pissed at George Stephanopoulos that he paid the twenty bucks to pursue a Hawaii state FOIA request)?

Please. Because he's a fucking dumbass, one of the stupidest theoretically smart people who's ever lived. And because he is one of the most pathetically insecure motherfuckers ever to politic. And the worst poker player ever. He really still thinks that Republicans can be his friends, he really thinks that logic plays some role in their machinations, in their disjointed and clannish and lower-Maslovian thought processes.

In short, he's a Jeffersonian. He'll fuck the slaves, oh yes he will, but he can't bear the thought of them figuring out that it's his cock plundering their holes. He doesn't understand why they can't just relax and be happy, and why the only people who can make them relax and be happy are the guys who not only want to rape the slaves, but break it off in their asses and then rape and gutshoot their sisters in front of them.

Wow. Sorry, Rude Pundit moment there. What I meant to say is this:

He's a Jeffersonian. He genuinely believes in the innate goodness of people. Well, fuck that, and God Bless Hobbes and Hamilton. As long as he wants these inbred, insular, xenophobic mongoloids to like him, he'll continue to be an ineffectual and irrelevant piece of lint in the bellybutton of history. What a fucking waste.

6 comments:

Sasha said...

And I say amen.

Sasha said...

Also.

Hail to the Redskins.
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-yoHmWNpq910/TX-Oe0eYPvI/AAAAAAAAI3E/Qe7LcqCqcDw/s400/IMG950437.jpg

Purplestate said...

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmkay. And you're Aaron Burr in this scenario?

Landru said...

Come back when you speak poli sci, Dr. Purple.

Tara Lindsay Hall said...

I <3 this post. I also <3 Thomas Hobbes. I am so frustrated that Obama wasted the first two years of his term when he had the support of Congress (not to mention most of the people) by prioritizing compromise over actually getting shit done. Naive much? Ugh...

I still love the man, though, bless his heart.

~Tara

Jim H. said...

Still think he can't play poker?

Silly? Yep. A distraction? Sure. Dude's making a life-and-death decision, cards close to the chest, that's a for-sure game changer. And nobody had a whiff of a hint of a whisp of clue.

Suck on this, piggies. You boys're sure gonna' look petty in a couple days. I mean PETTY!

Just sayin'. How could you've (or anyone've) known?