You Are My Minions: Me

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Me

Clock's ticking, Wheezus.
And let's not hear any more of this shit about me and cats:

That's why.

I'll probably mock the Sabbath and be back later with a USWNT-France post. Rules are for rubes.

9 comments:

Sasha said...: Out there in the west where the temperature is 142 to day they sleep in. (Yes, I defend all of my friends. Why do you ask?)

Happy. Y'old fart.; 7:40 AM
Purplestate said...: Happy. Missed playing games with y'all'n's this year.; 10:30 AM
Anonymous said...: Happy new ring on the trunk, Landru! And when I say "happy" I mean to dissuade any of your interior mental urgings to feel old... ain't nuthin' but a number, and I'll hit the same in 7 mos.; 10:39 AM
Lisa McMann said...: Eating bacon right...now.

http://lisamcmann.blogspot.com/2011/07/in-honor-of-our-dear-friend-landrus.html; 10:49 AM
Gothmog said...: Happy happy. The Wheezus is a tough act to follow.; 1:08 PM
Lisa McMann said...: So did you follow it?

I was gonna leave a link to the TAR summary in my blog post but my parents read my blog. So yeah...no.; 5:55 PM
Landru said...: Thanks and love to all, especially to my still-beloved attention whore buddies.

G, she gave me Weavers, man. WTF is anyone gonna do to follow that?; 8:28 PM
ilse said...: A poor little boy was a-lying in bed
Unable to sleep cause of snot in his head
His mommy came over, looked down on his cot
And offered sandpaper to soak up his snot
He thought this weren't right for to take up his boogers
(The real commercial was coated in sugar)
But a long story short must be made of this thing
So she gave him some Puffs for his mucousy strings.

Wow. You used to be funny.; 10:05 PM
Gothmog said...: I tried to give you Heather Mitts as a teenager. But I put it in the comments of the wrong post, and I don't have any photos. I suck.; 4:08 PM

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About Minions

You need to know that this is a self-indulgent vanity blog. I don't care how you got here (and you do get here by some very strange pathways); do not come here looking for deep unassailable meaning. If you knew me, you'd know better.

In case I need to spell this out for you, much of the content in this blog is either inside baseball (private public jokes between me and friends) or satirical. Much of my expression, even when talking about real-world stuff, is satirical. I have strong opinions. Here are a few:

Government exists to promote well-being.

Yes, that's a broad sweep.

Compromise is functionally necessary.

Hate is unacceptable in real life (sports excepted; if you don't like that distinction, you're not entirely wrong, and fair play to you). I elaborate on this because it's an easy word to use, and you may see me use it. I audit on this word, and I'm confident about the contexts in which I've used it here.

There is no need to compromise with hate.

Satire draws on the need to highlight that which is wrong.

The satirist should re-examine satire that sounds like hate.

That includes me.

You need to know that I sometimes use language that others find profane. While I believe that words are words and there's nothing to fear, I respect both opposing viewpoints and your right to not read this blog.

Sometimes I do write about serious things. When I do, I'm right, and you either agree with me or you're wrong. Sucks to be you, huh? Of course, if you knew me, you'd already understand this, and it would suck considerably less to be you.

You may find me incomprehensible. As a service to you, I have created the Minions glossary (updated in November 2017), to help you decipher. It's all about you, bitchez.

Wanna be my friend?
You know where to find me.
This blog's email address is minionsblog (at) gmail (dot) com. I check that email very infrequently. DM on Twitter (@landruajm) will get me faster. Lots faster. The old address was hacked and no longer belongs to Landru, because Google isn't very smart (and neither is Landru).
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