Friday, December 29, 2006

Words

Still, people think I have a blog. Herewith is some bulletized sop for those unfortunate believers.
  • Yeah. Sure. Christmas. Whatthefuckever.
  • Yeah. Sure. Gerald Ford. Whatthefuckever. See blackDogred, who has it pretty much right. You say "harmless," I say "perpetuated a culture of corruption while pretending he was being statesmanlike." You say "decent," I say "abused the presidential pardon power in the name of phony faith-healing." You say "statesman," I say "no, he really did play too much football without a helmet." I do say thank you for the national day of mourning, however. Oddly enough, I don't remember getting one of those for Richard Nixon.
  • Yeah. Sure. Bowl games. Whatthefuckever. Purdue 23, Maryland 19. No, I won't let it the fuck go.
  • Yeah. Sure. NFL. Whatthefuckever. Go Titians.
  • Yeah. Sure. Iraq. Whatthefuckever. Will hanging Sadaam Hussein make everyone just shut the fucking fuck up? How about "please"? C'mon. It'd be statesmanlike. Seriously.

A happy forthcoming year to you and all of those for whom you give a fuck.

4 comments:

Jolene said...

Go Titians.

Heeeeey. Don't think I didn't see that.

You know, I realized the other day that I couldn't remember if Nixon was actually dead or not. I finally decided he probably was, but I didn't care enough to actually look it up. So anyway, thanks for confirming.

purplestate said...

Terps scored a little more, boilermakers a little less.

You were born when? Oh, right, 1944, my bad. :P

Beat Dead Romanticists! said...

Go Titians, beat those Rubens!

kl said...

Happy Fuckin' New Year to you! :D