That's my motto here at YAMM. So it's unusual that I'm actually opining on things that happened as recently as yesterday. But I know I must slave away to keep this thing interesting for you. Because, as you may recall, this online magazine is all about you.
Novak: My friend BDR is going to quibble with me on this item, because he is incapable of giving the dessicated old charlatan any sort of break, which I must concede is a reasonable point of view. My view on the traitor is somewhat tempered by the fact that he is a huge contributor to University of Maryland athletics. I think maybe Novak is getting a bad rap for yelling dirty words on the set of CNN's Inside Politics (this is documented everywhere else in the blogosphere, so I'm not going to bother linking because, as a friend of mine is fond of saying, I'm not your fucking monkey).
Sources tell me that, rather than reacting to Carville, as many people thought, Novak was actually addressing a video that was playing on his monitor. The video, put together by waggish producers, consisted entirely of various clips of J.J. Reddick travelling.
Which he does, by the way, every fucking time he touches the fucking ball.
Roberts: Speculation is running rampant (Salon's War Room feature, citing various sources, including the supremely moronic Free Republic site, to which I will not link) that the Supreme Court nominee is a closeted homosexual. We can only hope that he's not as closeted as Rick Santorum.
Fascist Dickwipes: Representative Henry Bonilla, a jackass from some district in Texas, wants to rename a major thoroughfare in the District of Columbia. Guess who he wants to name it after. This sort of thing is the quintessence of why, in the District, schools should close for a day or two each year for hunting season, much like they do in some rural states. I'm partial to "Fuckwit Season," myself. Do these assclowns understand that they're fertilizing a Stalinesque cult of personality around the Dead Gipper? Would they even understand a word like "Stalinesque"? Have they even noticed that the fucker is dead?
I'm telling you, even if the limit is one fuckwit per season, we could still thin the herd pretty good here.
That's enough news. I'm not your fucking monkey.
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3 comments:
Actually the latest Novak theory is that there was a copy of Who's Who in America on the desk. Mebbe Ms. Plame's name really isn't in it, eh? More important, though, is that I am an adherent of the Jon Stewart theory that he is rotting from the inside out.
Roberts: I believe that the original source for the Roberts is Gay meme is Wonkette, who was wondering if she could get folks to believe it. But I don't have time to read her archives to check this morning.
Most important. You are mixing metaphors. You are calling them dickwipes, jackass, fuckwits, assclowns all in the same paragraph. I am getting very confused about body parts and the fascist relationship thereto. Also, this is a problem I don't want to have to examine too closely.
You think that I'm going to give Novak a break because he contributes to Twerp athletics?????? Ewwww. That makes it even more obvious that he is rotting from the inside.
As for my boy JJ-your problem is travelling and not the carry? Eh. You're just mad 'cause we're going to be so much better than you all next year.
To get to my house, you have to travel on the Ronald Reagan Hwy. Unless you want to go miles out of your way.
And you are ranting about a street?!?! Tush Tush.
I think we'd have Fish in a Barrel syndrome if there were a Fuckwit Season in Cincy.
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